Equable

This writing illustrates how "equable" is used.


She was equable, walking through conversations calm, cheerful and fair. Not
once was her face red or her fists clenched.

It didn't come easy - she said. She used to be impetuous. Equability was
about remaining objective – remembering that little things don't matter but
goals do.

"Don't let emotions cloud the bigger picture! Let what you strive for guide
you instead."

Mindfulness

It certainly is amazing what we can do in life. One such incident that
strikes me is how people can control their health using their minds. One
book that I read calls it "mindfulness".

While it may seem incredible and perhaps even frivolous to suggest that we
can control our health and other issues with our minds, it is actually a
very logical process.

For example, if you are aware you have an ailment e.g. migraine. Rather
than subscribing to the "it is a lifelong incurable condition" belief,
think instead that your migraine is likely to have slight variations from
other people's migraines, in terms of how it's triggered. With this in
mind, be very mindful about your lifestyle and on what or how you do
things. With such mindfulness, it increases your sensitivity towards your
daily life routines and makes you more aware of how you can control your
ailment from coming on.

I think mindfulness can be applied to many other aspects of our lives as
well.

Isn't it interesting for example, that we may not notice cars much, until
we have an intention of buying one and thus inevitably become mindful about
the cars around us? Rather than wait till situations happen to be mindful,
it pays to be more observant and clear about things around us.

By being mindful, we thus would not be easily "surprised" when we encounter
relationship or work challenges, because these finer points have already
been emerging in some form of pattern/trend way. In fact, we might even be
able to address these issues before they explode.

Of course, I think mindfulness goes beyond just looking and seeing.
Mindfulness requires you to observe, analyse and synthesise various
information. Armed with the knowledge, it increases one's confidence and
perspective of not just one's health, but also one's insights about the
world around us.

Perceive more, know more, remember more.

Read this in a book and I think it is very meaningful. When we try to learn anything, or for that matter, improve ourselves, we ought to remember to:

Perceive more – look at things from many different layers and in context. See beyond just what’s appearing at the surface, and try and get the undertones.

Know more – build up your skills and knowledge for different levels of your job. So that you don’t just become good in one very narrow area, but actually become all encompassing in several areas of your sphere of expertise.

Remember more – it’s good to commit to memory the lessons you’ve learnt. Otherwise, how can you ever improve? So with each learning experience, there’s a need to make an effort to put it into long term memory.

Pursue Your Dreams

We all have dreams to some extent, and I think we need to be brave and pursue them.

There are naysayers and there are obstacles. Sometimes you'll even wonder if you are of sufficient quality to make the cut to enter the areas in which your dreams lie.

But how would you know if you never try? If at least you tried, but failed, you could consider why you didn't make it the first time and then try again.

Life is a journey of challenges, and living life in a fulfilling manner means that the roads leading to our destinations will usually be covered with sharp stones and sticks, trying to deter us from even taking the path. But if we remain steadfast and take each step at a time, the problems become smaller rather than overwhelming. With each incremental success we experience, we become stronger and surer of ourselves.

Striking that delicate balance in life

Do we usually stop thinking at a particular time in life? After all, life becomes a constant, and the usual hum-drum of go to work, work work work, and go home to work, seems to continue day after day.

Yet, how can life be so? It's so...unnatural, so boring, so not worth living. I have a habit of planning milestones in my life - things I wish to accomplish: big things to me. It seems unnecessary and extra to people I speak to, but these are achievements that can make me feel that the learning curve has not reached a plateau, and more importantly, that I haven't stopped thinking.

But one wonders...when work piles up, and time is limited, how much affordances of strength and vitality does one have to keep this going?

There is a need to know how much to stretch one's self, without over-stretching. While a life without milestones is probably not worth living, this fruitfulness of life needs to be balanced out for personal sanity.

No such thing as 'no choice'

Today I talk about choices. I find it very strange that people talk about how victimised they are, when in truth, they have control over their lives. If they hate their jobs, they have the freedom to leave. If they feel disgruntled, they are able to voice out. Nobody is forcing them - they can decide. Of course, every decision comes with consequences. If you quit your job, you may need to take a pay cut, or you may find greener pastures. If you voice out, you may risk offending your boss or you might impress him if you come up with a counter-proposal. What are your smart choices? How do you choose what to do?

There's no point in feeling upset about your life when everything is really within your control. Of course, life would be better if more things could go our way, but the truth is: there's no smooth sailing in life. We should make the best of what we have, and be optimistic. Whatever doesn't work out, we make choices. Whatever works out, we make further choices.

There's no such thing as 'no choice'. We are consciously making choices everyday. When we say 'no choice', we're effectively surrendering ourselves to life's circumstances. It takes courage to say, "I have a choice" and to do the necessary.

Plain Water

How does it feel to be plain water - clean, clear and...neutral? You don't feel overly excited, neither do you feel overly upset. You're not acidic; you're not alkaline. You feel...in the middle. Neutral.

Let's not get into the details of chemistry, of what pH plain water is at. I refuse to liken myself to distilled water.

Is it Zen-like to feel mild like water, transcending life in some way or another? Yet, is it human to feel ever so neutral?

I see things deeper. I am calm. I get into flow when doing work. Yet, I am neutral, like water.

Is it age? Is it environment? Is it me - evolving?